Quiz Show (1994)

Herb Stempel: You wanna be worshipped? Go to India and moo.

Mark Van Doren: If you look around the table and you can't tell who the sucker is, it's you.

Mark Van Doren: Sixty-four thousand dollars for a question, I hope they are asking you the meaning of life.

Herb Stempel: And they love me for the same reason they used to hate me, because I'm the guy who knows everything.



Herb Stempel: [referring to television] That box is the biggest thing since Gutenberg invented the printing press, and I'm the biggest thing on it.

Herbert Stempel: I love my wife, but it's like living with a plague of locusts.

Herbie Stemple: You know why they call them Indians? Because Columbus thought he was in India. They're "Indians" because some white guy got lost.

Herbie Stemple: You want to be worshipped? Go to India and moo.

Mark Van Doren: Cheating on a quiz show? That's sort of like plagiarizing a comic strip.

Herb Stempel: Come and see Herbie Stempel get thrown to the Columbia lions! Watch Charles Van Doren eat his first kosher meal in his life.

Dan Enright: How much do they pay instructors up at Columbia? Charles Van Doren: Eighty-six dollars a week. Dan Enright: Do you have any idea how much Bozo the Clown makes? Charles Van Doren: Well... we, we can't all be Bozo the Clown.

Herb Stempel: Don't do this to me, it's humiliating. Enright: For seventy grand, Herb, you can afford to be humiliated.

[At a poker game.] Dick Goodwin: I know you're lying. Charles Van Doren: Bluffing. The word is bluffing.

Dick Goodwin: 21 is rigged and I can prove it...I have Enright cold and that means I have you. Kitner: Really? Dick Goodwin: Really. Kitner: Then how come you're the one who's sweating?

Mrs. Stemple: I know what you're gonna accomplish, I just don't know what he's gonna accomplish. Herbert Stemple: You want to know what? If I do nothing else I will convince them that Hebert Stemple knows what won the God-damned Academy Award for best God-damned picture of 1955; that's what I'm gonna accomplish.

Albert Freedman: It's not like we're hardened criminals here. We're in show business.

Charles Van Doren: I've stood on the shoulders of life and I've never gotten down into the dirt to build, to erect a foundation of my own. I've flown too high on borrowed wings. Everything came too easy.

Dick Goodwin: I asked myself, "why would he do this, he knows I'll come after him?" Then it occured to me. He knows I'll come after him.