Canadian Representative: Our government has apologized for
Bryan Adams on numerous occasions!
[After student provides incorrect answer to math problem]
Mr. Garrison: All right, now let's hear it from someone
who isn't a complete retard?
Canadian Ambassador: Can I finish? Can I finish? Can I finish?
[pause] I'm finished.
Sheila Broflovski: Just remember what the MPAA says: Horrific,
deplorable violence is okay, as long as people don't say
any naughty words!
Mr. Garrison: Sorry kids, I just can't trust something that
bleeds for five days and doesn't die.
[In bed together.] Satan: Is sex the only thing that matters
to you? Sadaam Hussein: I love you.
Terrance: You're such a pig-fucker, Phillip! Phillip: Terrance,
why would you call me a pig-fucker? Terrance: Well, let's
see. First of all, you fuck pigs. Phillip: Oh yeah!
Stan: Dude, what the fuck is wrong with German people?
[After student provides incorrect answer to math problem]
Mr. Garrison: Ok, now let's try to get an answer from someone
who's not a complete retard... anyone?
[To Phillip] Terrance: This is worse than the time when
I fell asleep and you put your dick in my mouth and took
a picture.
Brooke Shields: I once farted on the set of Blue Lagoon.
Stan: [singing] The sun is shining and the grass is green.
/ Under the three feet of snow, I mean.
Newscaster: It's been six weeks since Saddam Hussein was
killed by wild boars and the world is still glad to be rid
of him.
Cartman: Kyle, all those times I said you were a dumb, stupid
Jew, well, I was wrong, you're not a Jew. Kyle: Cartman,
I *am* Jewish! Cartman: There, there, don't be hard on yourself,
Kyle.
Cartman: That movie has warped my fragile little mind.
Cartman: Mom? If you were in a German Scheisse video, you...
you'd tell me, wouldn't you? [short pause] Mrs. Cartman:
Sure, hon.
Cartman: Yes, that's right, I saw the Terrance and Phillip
movie. Now who wants to touch me?
Chef: Haven't you heard of the Emancipation Proclamation?
General: I don't listen to hip-hop.
Kyle: Let me have some more candy Cartman. Eric Cartman:
Let's see, hmm, I don't have any Jewish candy. Kyle: Fine!
Like you really need more, fat boy!
Dr. Doctor: We accidentally replaced your heart with a baked
potato. You have about three seconds to live.
Stan Marsh: But this is going to be the best movie ever!
It's a foreign film from Canada.
Stan Marsh: Hang on, before you do, search for the word
"clitoris." Kyle Broslofski: OK, hang on... 1,830,000 pages
found with the word clitoris.
Stan Marsh: What would Brian Boitano do / If he was here
right now / He'd make a plan and he'd follow through / That's
what Brian Boitano would do.
Mr. Garrison: I can't wait to take leave so I can get me
some fucking poontang.
Saddam Hussein: All this torturing people gets me HOT!
Kyle Broflovski: Hey, Mole, be careful. Mole: Careful? Was
my mother careful when she stabbed me in the heart with
a clothes hanger while I was still in the womb? Stan Marsh:
Man, that kid is fucked up!
Eric Cartman: Kyle, all those times I called you a stupid
Jew, I didn't mean it. You're not a Jew. Kyle Broflovski:
Yes I am, Cartman! I AM a Jew! Eric Cartman: No, no, don't
be so hard on yourself.
